To say that I had fallen off the running "band-wagon" would be an understatement. My last race was a 10K in November of 2008. Since then, I have hardly committed any time to running... or taking much care of myself (gaining 30 pounds in my running-hiatus)... or those important relationships with the people who love me the most (my family), for that matter. What have I been so distracted with, you ask? Well... trying to keep my head above water in this new out-on-my-own life that I have had since I graduated college 2 years ago could have something to do with it. My job as a Marketing and Public Relations Representative at a major hospital in Southeast Texas might be another guess. But my ever-failing 5 year long relationship with the love of my life (thus far) was the kicker. Breaking up over and over because your relationship should have been over a year ago can take up a lot of your attention. Especially when you are planning weddings and futures together in the process. But needless to say... that relationship has run it's course, and along with it... a huge wake up call has arisen.
I had no control over my life what-so-ever. Period. I had given in to emotions and circumstances and settling and a MAN. I had placed a much higher priority on these things than myself. Enough was enough. I had to sit down on my rock bottom floor, and ask myself... "Why are you not good enough? Why do you not believe in yourself?"
And in answering these questions... realizations came to my mind such as:
"You ARE good enough! You are smart, witty and strong. You are very deserving of the very best and can do anything you set your mind to!"
And in this epiphany, I asked myself... what do I love? What can change my life? What can I do for myself that is only for me? What is it that I can control and depend on no one for? What will restore my empowerment? What will take me places that I have never been? What will bring me fulfillment and a sense of accomplishment that I can be proud of for the rest of my life? What can bring me peace and beauty in my life inside and out? What can make me a stronger person? What is my passion?
And the answer came to me clearly.... Running.
So this is my story.... from here on out. The story of how I gained control of my life. How I became empowered and gripped tight of a strong belief in myself. How I became a strong independent woman who loved herself and relied on no one. The story of how I threw myself back into shape and lost 30+ pounds by running and living a healthy lifestyle. The story detailing the process of my training for the San Antonio Rock&Roll Marathon on November 15, 2009. And then on to my training process for the Oklahoma City Memorial Marathon on April 25th, 2010. It will detail my ups and downs, pains and gains, friendships, loves, and life. Your more than welcome to come along for the miles. I hope you enjoy.